Observations via a French Textbook

I haven't just written in a long time.

It seems more and more that every time I decide to come on here and write it's always because of girl problems or because I want to rip someone apart piece by piece. As the first post on here says, and as many detailing the fact that I haven't "just written" in a long time, this place was made so that I could sit down and splurge random nonsense that someone somewhere might find funny.

So I was looking through my French textbook today in class.

Today we learned, or in my case re-learned, people description words. Things like old, young, fat, skinny, tall, small, etc. Then I noticed a few things.

First of all, it seems like it's a rule in all foreign language textbooks that the little cartoon showing the difference between "old" (in this case, vieux) and "young" (jeune) has to include a number of things.

1.) An old man that is clearly stuck in his glory days, quite possibly because of Alzheimer's or a slight form of Dementia. This means that he's wearing a vest over a long shirt and, to top it off, a bowtie. It kind of makes me think that the dude is remembering his days as a Riverboat blackjack dealer back in ole' Mississippi. He used to hit or stay with the best of him, presumably at some of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn's sexy parties (Sexy parties probably didn't happen in either of their respective books. I didn't actually read them. I just figured the reception they got meant that there was at least one mention of an orgy).

2.) An old man that is clearly stuck in his glory days is standing very awkwardly next to a boy at least five decades his junior, and the boy doesn't seem to have any problem with it. In fact, he seems like he's more than okay with it. He's enjoying having pre-historic crotch-al regions within two feet of his face.

And then there's the fatties.

Is it just me, or is it kind of socially acceptable for an old woman in glasses to be fat? I don't think I've ever looked at one in disgust (unless they're one of those fuckers that scoots around Market Street in a Hoveround instead of getting off their asses and walking). I can look at morbidly obese women in their 20s and find it absolutely repulsive, the same going for men of just about any age.

But for some reason, when it gets to women above 50, any fat they may have just kind of becomes acceptable for regular members of society. They might still get called a fat cow at 49, but as soon as they cross that 50 threshold it's as if they've earned that fat. I'm not about to come out and say that I understand the pains of menopause of childbirth, but if the several red wine-inspired conversations I've heard on TV about the both of them lead me to believe that both of them are horrible beyond words. Who am I to say a little paunch isn't completely okay at that point?



Again, this was a refreshing little shindig we had here. I'm kind of looking forward to the next one I think of.

Also, in the news department, I've decided that I'm going to try my hand at Improv comedy. There's a club on campus that plays Whose Line is it Anyways?-style improv games on Thursdays. I'm probably going to redefine what it means to suck, but I'll have fun and meet people, so there's that.



There are two types of people in this world: Those who like Neil Diamond, and those who don't. My ex-wife loves him.